Tuesday, December 22, 2015

A Tooth, Shoes and Keeping It Very Real

I have done dozens of selfies over the last year or so. I don’t know if anyone noticed, but I had a broken false tooth close to the front. It was held in by a bridge from about 1970 that amazingly was still solid. The little tooth was chipped and bent out crooked. Lynn and I have found a wonderful dentist here in Torquay and he was able to fit a new tooth onto the old bridge and it works well and looks just fine! I am very grateful.

I never thought to be wearing, much less endorsing, the odd little shoes called Crocs. Of course I have been aware of them for years. Many friends said how much they love them and I really just didn’t believe it. I saw doctors and nurses working in them, but still they did not look comfortable to me. They also did not look like anything you could walk any distance in. I was wrong (yes, it can happen). I have Crocs now and love them. I ended up walking several miles in the sand the other day (twice) and amazingly they performed beautifully. Much better than my beloved old Keens do in the sand. Yes, I love my Crocs and I am grateful for them.
They really are great.
As I have stated, possibly ad nauseam, being genuine is very important to me. I have written from my heart in these blogs and posts. But perhaps I have still not been clear enough. 

As I focus on the positive and the gratitude, I often make references to the fact that I am writing these as much for me to learn, as for others to read. I am not naturally positive or grateful, nor am I always as “happy” as the selfies look, or as my writing sounds, but I am never false in what I write. It is a process, and damn it, at least I am in process! Some do not understand it. Much of my life at this point could be aptly called, “Living the Dream”. I love most of the stuff that I am doing! I am grateful that I have made the choices that created the opportunities to be doing this! And some were hard choices.

These opportunities came at a price… comfort, security and trust are a few of those prices. There are relationship situations still in my life that cannot be fixed, much less even discussed, no matter how new-agey an attitude I espouse. Regardless of how much I know that “It is what it is,” those situations create and feed anxiety and anger. I have dealt with anxiety issues my entire life. I self-medicated with alcohol for decades, and now I have been sober over 25 years. However, as George Carlin so beautifully said, “Just because the monkey is off your back, doesn’t mean the circus has left town.” I do have a much better handle on that ‘circus’ than I ever have before and for that I am deeply grateful. Yes I am in process and I plan to stay in process! He not busy being born is busy dying (Dylan). 

I may not really know what my future holds, but I am very happy with my new tooth and I love my Crocs. I am grateful. 
Oh, and I like my new hat too.

Birds. Peace. Love. Earth. Laughter. Music.

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